augustine was pretty wise
I've borrowed this from a friend's signature
"If you believe what you like in the gospels, and reject what you don't like, it's not the gospel you believe, but yourself." -Augustine
Oh, how this sounds like someone I have the misfortune to know!
Of course, I am probably guilty of this at times as well.
Jaden's father has decided that although he fathered Jaden, he has no desire to be his dad - that being his dad would 'rob' his new life of all it deserves - LOSER!!
Sorry, couldn't help that :)
is actually a much kinder word than I had in mind, but I am censoring myself :)
posted by DebP @ 6:18 PM
5 Comments
5 Comments:
I'm so sorry for you and for Jaden that his dad isn't there to be a dad. While I try to appreciate the times my ex IS there as a father, it is heartbreaking to see the pain (sometimes expressed, somtimes not) my teenaged son is experiencing because he doesn't have a day in, day out father.
I don't have any answers for you. All I can do is to encourage you to lean on God for His strength and guidance.
At one of my lowest points ever as a mom, one of the pastors at my former church said, "You shouldn't have to shoulder the burden of being both mom and dad (on a daily basis) to your child. That's not how God intended it to be. But since you ARE in that situation, you are enough."
I burst into tears and said, "No, I'm not. I'm not enough. I don't feel enough. I'm not a dad. My son needs a dad." And he said, "God will give you the strength to be enough even when you think you aren't. God placed your son with you for a reason."
I wasn't sure if I should appreciate the encouragement or suspect it as another "easy answer." I didn't really believe what he said. And some days I still don't. But struggling to believe it helps me in some weird way. And I hope that it can help you.
God will make you enough for Jaden. God will provide people to give him what you can't. God will be to Jaden what you can't ever be as a dad or as a mom. God placed Jaden in your arms, in your situation, with your strengths and weaknesses, and with your massive love for him for a reason. You are enough. Even though it's hard to believe.
thank you ttm,
it does help :)
Hey someone does read my sig, unless someone else has the same one:)
Anyway got your pics which reminded me I haven't been to your blog in quite a bit so figure I'd talk about them here (the pics that is) but of course now my focus goes on the dad. That's sad how people are able to do such things, and I've told you my story although I do not leap for joy that my daughter doesn't have her dad in her life daily, the Lord has covered her in a way where I haven't had the issues of his missing and I try to really dig to be sure it's not just daugher protecting mom.
I'm sure that can be different when it comes to boys yet if it's truly God doing the keeping, I believe he can do the same for Jaden, that he'll provide godly role models that'll influence. And I pray that Jaden is able to recognize those who God places in his life, same for you mom....I'm sure it doesn't feel that way but you're both the ones better off.
I was reading a scripture also the other day forgive me I can't remember the exact scripture but it was speaking on how we ought not fret the wicked and what they appear to be getting away with because their day will come to be judge. God is extending this period of grace for all to repent and when people do not see immediate consiquence for their actions they think they're cool nothing will come of it but the day will indeed come when all will be judged for what they did on this earth...I pray that God will give you the grace to place focus on his eternity not in a ha ha way but a heart to be concerned about his coming to repentance.
Jaden is growing beautifully still btw:) and I apologize for any typos and being so long winded.
and I see I should have read ttm's first:-) Amen to that as well.
I haven't been here in forever! Been so busy I forgot about it - thanks donna for your posts (was your sig :) )
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